Friday, April 13, 2007

Thank You. No Kidding!

Yeah, I do indeed keep a blog. But my day job has kept me busy as Ugly Betty this week... always good. But busy.

Anyway, been re-reading this book Making a Literary Life by Carolyn See. It's a book I read a few years back before I became a published author. It's filled with wonderful and honest, first-person thoughts and sage advice from Carolyn See on life as a writer and a dreamer. Wonderful book for anyone interested in literary careers.

But there's a section in the book on dealing with compliments and criticism, and I've found it to be very helpful with not only comments on my books, but general comments in general.

The author recommends a simple "Thank You" response when someone goes on and on about how great they think you are. Many times we want to deflect or deny positive remarks from people. A simple "thank you" is enough and keeps the conversation going.

When dealing with negative remarks, criticism, hateratioon, the author recommends a simple "No kidding!" response. At first, I was like -- no way. But having respoded "no kidding!" a few times to obvious or subtle criticism, I've noticed it acknowledges the person, but puts the ball back in the criticizer's court and it gives them nothing to respond to.

After all, it's soooo not The Secret to engage in conversation about someone else's negative comments and energy.

Anyway, just remember -- Thank You and No Kidding! Makes life -- literary or otherwise -- a little simpler.
fs

2 comments:

D-Place said...

I'm going to use that "No Kidding" thanks! I'll let you know how it works. People at my job always seem to have something to say whether you want to hear it or not.

tjalexander said...

Fred,
I'm a fellow writer. Read your blog daily. Like your posts I too have read Carolyn See and found her very informative. Good luck with "Right Side"